


A Russian Ex-Gangster's Guide to the No-Gang Life (And How to Completely Ignore It)

by IrkenCupcakes13



Category: Grand Theft Auto V
Genre: Gen, Recreational Drug Use
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-02
Updated: 2015-01-16
Packaged: 2018-03-04 23:30:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,311
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3096599
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/IrkenCupcakes13/pseuds/IrkenCupcakes13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Katya Bazanova, a Russian gangster who had decided, after something went wrong, to leave the gang that she devoted her life to and move to Los Santos. She lived her life normally, well as normal as ones life could be in LS. She became an assassin and dabbled in the drug selling business, earning enough money to buy a cozy little apartment in Vespucci Beach and live her criminal life in peace. That is until Mark Trainor, a man looking to make it big in the city the only way he can, asks Katya to join his newly formed gang.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. I Don't Do Gangs

“So, who’s on the first file?” A man, leader of a new gang, asked, a slight British accent could be heard, looking up at a younger man in his late-twenties.

“Katya Bazanova. Here’s her file.” The younger man said, placing the binder in front of the other man, who picked it up and started reading it after finishing his glass of bourbon.

**-=-**

**Name:** Katya Bazanova

**Age:** 26

**Sex:** Female

**Hometown:** Dedovsk, Russia

**Occupation:** Assassin + Drug Dealer

**Residence:** 2057 Vespucci Blvd, Apt. 1

**Hair Color:** Brown

**Eye Color:** Hazel

**Strengths:** Sniping, Hand-to-Hand Combat, Driving

**Weaknesses:** N/A

**Sanity:** Not too sure, will have to test it if she is recruited.

-=-

“Keep in mind, sir, that this is only what we’ve gotten from two months of observation and a bit of in-depth internet browsing. So we haven’t been able to find out all her strengths and weaknesses as of yet.” The younger man said, assuming a more professional position, feet shoulder width apart and hands folded behind him.

The older man hummed, his gravelly voice making it sound more like a growl. “We need someone to watch our backs during heists, but she needs to be tested first, or I at least need to see what she’s capable of. We can bring her in, and after we’ve gotten everyone we’ll start up our first heist, a small one, maybe a convenience store or small bank. We can decide who stays and who goes then.

-===================================================================================-

Katya woke up in her apartment the same as any other day, slowly and then after a cup of coffee, black with no sugar as per usual, she was wide awake and alert. And thanks to the caffeinated drink she now realized that someone was in her house. The kitchen window, which always was closed and covered by the blinds, was still closed but the blinds where wide open. She immediately reached for her back pocket to grab a pocket knife that should have been there, but wasn’t.

“C’mon, fuck-head! I don’t need a knife to choke you until you’re blue in the face!” Katya yelled, her Russian accent slipping in towards the end.

“No need to get all feisty, I’m just here to offer a business proposition.” A gravelly voice stated from the living room. She looked in the direction of the voice and noticed a man leaning against the wall with an amused smile on his face.

“Look, buddy, I don’t sell drugs until the weekend and I don’t accept contracts from people who break into my house. So you need to scram before I drag you down Vespucci Beach with my Elegy.” Katya scowled at the man, crossing her arms as she watched the man walk closer to her.

“Not that doesn’t sound absolutely _thrilling_ , but I’m not leaving until you listen to what I have to say, Katya.” The man, which looked to be in his thirties, said after stopping about two feet in front of the assassin.

“How the hell do you know my name? And why the fuck should I listen to the creep who just broke into my house and hid in the fucking shadows? Also, I want my damn knife back.” The Russian held out her hand, waiting for the man to hand her the knife, which he did before talking.

“I’m Mark Trainor, leader of the up-and-coming gang, name is currently under discussion. But we need a good sniper, and from what my little hacker and stalker friends have dug up, it seems that you happen to be one of the best in Los Santos. So, my proposition to you is thi-“

“No.” Katya interrupted, a stern tone to her voice and an annoyed look on her face. “I don’t do gangs, not anymore.”

“Ah, yes. Your former gang, The Firebirds if I’m translating that correctly,”

“You are.”

“You were rather popular, and you guys were sort of like a group of Robin Hood’s. You helped the ones who needed it and ruined the lives of those who crossed you. Practically unstoppable, you lot. That is until the second in command, an American boy named Jamie Walker, sold secrets to the rival gang. The biggest one, at least to you, being a large shipment of drugs that you were sent to pick up. You were ambushed and attacked, beaten nearly to death. You were found, healed, and got tossed in jail. You stayed for three years before breaking out and making it to the states, more specifically Los Santos. You made enough money from paid assassinations and robbing stores to buy this cozy little apartment. And now you’re here.” The man-Mark Trainor-said, a small smile on his face.

Katya wanted to punch it off of him.

“You definitely have some good guys working intel for you.” Katya said, keeping a calm composure, or at least she tried her best to. “The answer is still _no_.” She stressed the final word, making it clear to the Brit that that was her final answer.

“Okay, okay. How about, I let you think about it. After a couple weeks I’ll come back. If you say no, I’ll leave and hopefully you won’t see me ever again.” Mark suggested, a hopeful look etching over his face.

“I’d prefer if we just skipped to that last part. But I have a feeling that that’s not gonna happen.” Katya huffed, rubbing her forehead in annoyance. “So fine. Whatever. But please, knock next time.”

“No promises.” The gang leader said with a smile as he walked past Katya and to the kitchen window.

“Goodbye!” He exclaimed cheerily as he opened the window and jumped through it and into the bushes.

“What did I do to deserve this?” She muttered to herself, slamming the window shut and pulling the blinds together quickly.


	2. Welcome to the Gang, Ms. Bazanova

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The two weeks are up. Now, Katya must decide whether to take her chances with this new gang, or just turn away and run for the hills.

Exactly two weeks later, Katya had completely forgotten about the man who broke into her apartment. It was the last thing she’d start thinking about, especially since she’s on a very important job right now. A very wealthy man asked her to kill another very wealthy man for a very wealthy sum of cash, and the number to one of the best hackers in town, Lester.

She was so close to being the richest motherfucker she knew, that is until Mr. Mark Trainor decided that the time for introductions was exactly when she was finally able to find the old coot she was sent to kill from her make-shift snipers nest on to of a parking garage across the street.

“Times up, Ms. Bazanova.” Mark whispered into her ear, causing her to miss her shot and scare away the old bastard.

“Oh my fucking _God_!” She yelled, whirling around to face the man who she most definitely hated. “What the fuck do you want now, you mother fucking piece of shit?!” She asked as she tore off her black bloody hockey mask and tossed it onto the ground.

“I said two weeks. It’s been two weeks, Katya.” He said, a shit-eating grin plastered on his face.

“Couldn’t it have waited until I finished my job?! That fat bastard was almost dead and I was almost a million dollars richer!” Katya yelled, pointing at the spot that her victim was once standing.

“It could have, but I was getting bored.” Mark shrugged, seeming to not realize how bad of a move that was.

Katya grabbed the man by his shirts collar, sweeping her feet under his and pinning him to the ground. She swiftly pulled out her knife and held it to his throat, her face fixed a glare that burned holes through the man under her and a snarl not unlike an angry dogs.

“You mother fucking asshole couldn’t wait _one more_ _second_?!” She yelled, pushing on the knife hard enough for it to draw blood. “I could’ve had a fucking penthouse but _NO_! Your impatient ass had to ruin it for me!”

After a moment of silence and heavy breathing on Katya’s part, Mark started to speak again. “Ms. Bazanova, what if I told you we could be getting millions on a weekly basis? All you need to do is join my gang. I swear it won’t turn out like your old one. I’m only recruiting the best of the best.”

Katya continued to glare at the man, though her hold on the man loosened and the knife was raised from his neck a small bit.

“One job. We’ll see how it goes. Even if it turns out good I can’t promise I’ll stay.” The Russian said as she stood up and walked away from the man and towards her setup to gather her equipment and her trusty blue sniper.

“Great!” Mark exclaimed as he stood, brushing off the gravel that stuck to his clothes. “Meet at this address on Friday at 9:00 PM, we’ll discuss the plan then.

“Fantastic.” Katya sighed, sarcasm lacing her voice.

-=-

The rest of the week came and went as fast as the train that circled the city. Friday practically slapping the ex-gangster in the face. Katya, ever so punctual, decided to stop for a bite to eat on her way to her destination. She spent about 20 minutes eating and another 10 just looking out the window of the shitty diner she chose to procrastinate at. Eventually she got up and left, not paying for the food. She hopped on her Bati, starting it up quickly and zooming away before the waitress could stop her.

About 15 minutes later she rolled up in front of an old warehouse that she could vaguely remember hiding from the cops in one time. She slid off her helmet, placing it on her motorcycle before getting off and slipping on her signature mask. She knew she was quite infamous, with both the cops and the criminals of Los Santos. Being a well-known criminal had its perks. Such as being able to either scare the shit out of someone, or have someone else look at you with admiration.

After a moment of thought, Katya walked up to the warehouse doors and opened them, walking in as if she owned the place.

-=-

“How do you even know this broad is gonna show? You said it yourself, she hates gangs.” A young black man asked, looking at Mark, expecting an answer.

“Of course she’s gonna show. If she doesn’t than we don’t have a sniper and the she’s got all of our lives on our hands if the heist goes south.” A slightly older Asian woman replied, balancing a knife on her pointer finger.

“She’s an assassin, Lucille. She has killed more people on purpose than you have by accident.” An Asian man, around the same age as the woman, said with a smirk and a playful shove to said woman.

“Seriously though, what if she doesn’t show? What’d we do then?” A young blonde haired man asked, his voice laced with concern.

Mark was about to respond, though he was cut off by the oh-so fashionably late Katya Bazanova

“Well if it isn’t the Petty Criminals of the Round Table and King Dickhead himself. Oh how honored I am to be in the presence of such greatness.” Katya interrupted, bowing with her hands extended in front of her, the middle fingers of each hand extended.

“The Head-Shot actually showed up! I’m honestly very shocked.” The blonde man said with a hand over his heart, faking surprise.

“So that’s what they’re calling me these days? I honestly preferred ‘The Invisible Sniper’. It had a sort of flare to it, didn’t it?” She smiled, though it went unnoticed due to the mask.

Katya observed the group in front of her. The black man looked as if he was starting to sweat, clearly nervous to be near such a notorious killer. The two Asians had their backs straightened, looking at her with respect. The blonde man lookin uninterested with Katya. And Mark was as stupid looking as always, though another small lanky man stood right by him. If Katya didn’t know better she’d say they looked to be conjoined at the hip.

“Well, shall we get to the introductions?” Mark asked, looking around at the group for agreements. After gaining a few shrugs and a nod he started. “As you all seem to know, this is ‘The Head-Shot’, or Katya Bazanova, she specializes in contracted kills and dabbles in the drug selling business. She’s gonna be our sniper, if everything goes according to plan.”

“This is Harry Clarke, though you may know him as ‘The Arsonist’. You may also know him by all those big fires around town, his most recent act of arson being on the pier, where he burnt down most of the buildings and cars there.” Mark gestured to the blonde, who smiled smugly and crossed his arms. “He’s going to help get rid of evidence and cover our tracks, he’s also gonna be our distracter, going in and distracting whoever needs distracting.”

“These two are Lucille and James Bennett. These two have been robbing jewelry stores and banks for almost as long as Katya has been completing contracts. Weasel News has taken to calling them ‘The Gemini Thief’s’.“ Mark pointed to the twins, who seemed to straighten their backs even further and smile. “They’re gonna be the ones we go to if we need to hold up a bank or store.”

“And here we have Michael Johns, our drug specialist and medic. He’s going to be in charge of all our drug trades and he’ll take care of any injuries we get that don’t require and ER visit, we have a doctor ready for any serious injuries.” Mark looked at the young black man, who nodded and tried to look as professional as he could.

“Who’s the parasite stuck to you?” Katya asked, pointing to the man beside Mark, who stepped aside.

“I’m Dameon Parsons, I’m the gang’s resident hacker.” He said quickly before returning to his position beside Mark, who cleared his throat.

“Any questions?” He asked, clapping his hands together and looking at the group, stopping on Katya, who was pointing at herself.

“Yeah, uh, no offense but what’s with all the string beans? Where’s all the muscle?! How do expect us to survive with Charlie Brown’s Christmas tree on his own distracting the security guards out back? What’s he gonna do, suck their dicks?” Katya asked, pointing at Harry with her thumb when she spoke of him.

“I can handle myself. I know how to use a gun, and my reflexes are sharp as a tack.” Harry defended himself, looking at Katya with an annoyed expression.

Katya stared at him for a moment, an eyebrow raised, before grabbing the kids arm and twisting it behind his back and kicking the backside of his knees, making him fall to his knees with a pained groan. Katya kept a tight hold on his arm, pushing up slightly on his arm, causing him to whisper out a pained ‘fuck’.

“Your reflexes aren’t so quick, now. Are they?” Katya whispered into his ear smugly, letting go after a second with a push that sent him to the ground.

“I wasn’t fucking prepared, you crazy bitch!” Harry spat as he stood up, shaking out his arm before rubbing his shoulder lightly.

“Well, you should’ve been! I’m always alert and ready to block a punch or give a fatal blow at any moment in time. I have to be or I’d be dead by now. I’d be in a shallow grave underneath an overpass because I didn’t see the punch that sent me to the ground unconscious, with no way to stop the bullet that flew through my head moments after. Is that what you want? To rot in a grave?!” Katya hissed, her face only inches from the young mans, who looked slightly terrified as he looked into the hazel eyes that bore into his own green ones.

“Katya, you’re scaring the poor kid. You two can settle this another time. For now, we need to discuss our first heist.” Mark laid his hand on Katya’s shoulder after a moment of staring between the two, pulling her away from the kid who was more than happy to break the stare.

Katya huffed and crossed her arms, nodding stiffly as she stared straight forward.

“Okay, let’s get to it then.” Mark clapped his hands together, the charismatic smile back on his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm really liking this! I hope you are too! Leave a Kudos if you like it and please don't forget to leave a comment to help me get better at writing! This isn't beta'd, so any mistakes are mine!


	3. Sounds Like A Plan, Boss-Man!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The gang gets briefed on what will happen on their first heist together.
> 
> Also, Katya gets high on Mt. Chiliad and Harry happens to be there as well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Dudes, I really like this chapter. Also, I'm gonna try to make the chapters longer as I go along. Also, any feedback would be great!

“This heist is gonna be simple. We wanna test out how you all work together. I’ll be in there with you guys, and Dameon is gonna watch our backs, keeping an eye on any security cams and any other form of recording device in the area.” Mark looked around at the group in front of him. All nodding to let him know they were listening.

“The place we’re robbing is called The Polished Jewel. It’s a jewelry store just outside Vespucci Beach.” Mark pointed at an area he circled on the map he had laid out before, the location of the store. It wasn’t far from Katya’s own apartment, though she paid no mind to it. It’s not like she was going to go straight there after the heist with cops on her tail.

“They have two entrances, a front and back door. The back is guarded by two men at all times. They change out every ten hours. That’s where Harry comes in, with a little help from Michael.” The boss started, making a grand gesture to the two mentioned people. “Michael, before they swap out you are going to call them over, screaming for help. You’re gonna tell them that a man just stabbed your best friend and he was getting away, or some other thing that makes them come to help. Then you lead them into this alley,” Mark pointed to a spot that he highlighted with a bright red marker. “Where Harry would be waiting to distract him in whatever ways he sees fit. Hopefully in a way that injures them.” Mark smiled at the two, earning a small nod in return from them both.

“From there, Katya and will take care of the two fill-ins. Katya will be positioned on the roof of a three story building across the street,” Mark pointed to where the building is on the map, Katya giving a small grunt to let him know she understood. “Sniping them both as quickly as she can. Hopefully it will go off just fine.”

“Oh, it will. I never miss a shot.” Katya gloated, her smugness could practically be felt by the others.

“If I remember correctly, you mi-“

“If you continue that sentence I will cut your tongue off and shove it so far up your ass you’ll be able to taste your intestines.”

“Someone sounds like they put a little too much vinegar in their diet.” James joked, though a glare from the Russian was all it took to wipe the grin off his face.

“Okay, as I was saying. After Katya takes out the guards the twins and I will run into the store, killing who ever tries to stop us and taking as many jewels as we can. Dameon should have deactivated any alarms they have and have full control of the security system by then so we should be able to get in, get out, and come back with over $40,000 worth of jewels.”

“Sounds like a plan, boss-man.” Michael rhymed with a silly grin on his face, giving a playful salute to the man-in-charge.

“That’s great enthusiasm you got there, kiddo. But all that matters when we’re out there is that we are all focused and ready for whatever Los Santos throws at us.” Mark gave Michael a pat on the back before ruffling the kid’s dark brown curls. “I don’t wanna lose any of you so quickly. Hopefully I won’t for as long as we do this.”

Katya scoffed, getting sickened by the sentiment. “I’m gonna go before we all start humping each other in some sort of sappy love-fest.” Katya said as she spun around on her heels until she was facing the exit behind her and strode out, only pausing to hear Mark say he was going to send her the date and time through text.

-=-

“What a fucking bitch.” Harry breathed out in annoyance after hearing Katya’s motorcycle zoom away.

“She takes some getting used to. She had a… falling out of sorts with her last gang. It’ll take time for her to come around.” Mark said, looking at Harry with the same ol’ charisma he always had.

Harry sighed, no longer as annoyed as he was before but he sure as hell wasn’t gonna let them know that. He crossed his arms and huffed, turning to the exit and walking out.

A moment of silence passed over the group, Mark deciding to break it first. “Okay, I’ll send you all a text with the details for the heist. I’m assuming you all have rides?” Lucille and James nodded, Michael gave a sound that sounded sort of like an ‘I don’t know’.

“We’ll pick you up. When the time comes just meet us on the boardwalk.” James said, not allowing Michael to say no before walking out, Lucille in toe.

“Do you need a ride home?” Dameon asked Michael, who shook his head.

“I’ll take a cab to my motel of the week, I’ll be fine.” He answered, nodding his head in a way of thanks, and leaving the warehouse.

“We’ve got ourselves a gang, Dameon!” Mark exclaimed after a moment of staring at the large metal door to the building.

-=-

Katya entered her tiny apartment, a sigh of relief escaping her lips. She could finally rest and get some well-needed shut-eye. Last night was a busy night for her. She sold twice the drugs she usually did at her favorite club. Not that she was complaining, the opposite of that in fact. But it did leave her feeling completely drained. She plopped down on the couch, sliding her mask off afterwards. She looked at the time. 6:00 pm. She could wait another few hours before sleeping. But she needed something to keep her occupied until then.

Katya looked around the room tiredly, her eyes landing on a bag of joints thrown haphazardly onto the coffee table next to a pamphlet from Mt. Chiliad she had grabbed on her first visit there. She sat up suddenly, an idea coming to mind. She stood up and grabbed the joints and ran out of her apartment, being sure to grab a lighter on her way out.

An hour later she found herself on the mountains peak, leaning against the railing of the platform that stood at Mt. Chiliad’s peak, breathing in deep puffs of the drug with practiced ease. She watched the stars as they seemed to twirl around one another.

“Are you stoned?” A familiar voice asked from behind her. She twirled around really fast, or at least it felt like she did. She couldn’t really tell.

“Fuck yeah. Have you ever been stoned Harold? It’s fucking amazing!” She said enthusiastically. Catching the blonde off guard.

Harry usually goes to the mountains peak to clear his thoughts and get some alone time. So, it’s needless to say that he was shocked to see ‘The Headshot’ herself getting high as a kite, chuckling to herself about God knows what.

“I can’t say I have. It’s Harry, by the way.” He responded, an amused smile on his face.

Katya stayed silent for a moment, staring at Harry with a blank expression. Eventually she started speaking again. “Pssh. Harry, Harold, same thing.” Another moment went by with Katya just staring at the man. “You should try it!” She exclaimed, holding out the roll of marijuana.

“No, I’m good. I’d rather be in full control of my motor functions on my way home. Thanks anyway.” Harry started walking towards the Russian. The bags under her eyes showed more the closer he got, he tossed that issue aside though. Once he got up on the platform, he sat Indian-style, his back against the wooden railing.

“What’re you doing up here?” He asked Katya, who only shrugged, a muttered ‘I was bored’ leaving her lips as she sat next to him. Her legs were spread out. Her grandma would’ve scolded her for being un-lady like then. The thought made her laugh.

“What are _you_ doing here, Harry?” She asked, her facial expression blank as she stared at something just past Harry’s head.

“I was bored.” Harry shrugged, a smile tugging at the corner of his lips. He found that he liked the assassin while she was high. She was far more tolerable now than she was before.

Katya chuckled at his repetition of what she said as she took another long drag of the joint, only clearing her throat lightly afterwards.

“Y’know, I don’t hate you as much while you’re all loopy like this.” He commented idly, not looking at the person he was talking to. Instead he watched the stars, trying to find all the constellations as he could name.

“I don’t hate you as much when I’m all loopy like this.” Katya said, looking into Harry’s eyes for a second before starting to laugh.

“I take that back. You’re laugh is annoying as fuck.” Harry grimaced, though the corners of his lips betrayed him as they curved upward slightly.

Katya replied by crossing her arms and looking him right in the eyes and saying in the most serious tone she could muster. “You’re face I annoying as fuck.”

Harry raised his brow, an amused smile on his face. He watched as Katya seemed to think of something suddenly, because she took a deep breath and put her hands on Harry’s shoulders.

“I’m really hungry. Can you buy me a burger?”

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is the first fanfic I've written that I actually like. Constructive criticism is always appreciated and of course a kudos or two could go a long way! I hope you like this, let me know if you want more!


End file.
